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WOOHOO I'M A 1 STAR CANOEIST!!! AHAHA yup our 1 star course just ended today and i must say its fun though its kinda tiring and i miss training seriously. But kallang is a awesome place to paddle. As you paddle you can see the town area and also the flyers. GUESS WHAT! We could even hear the F1 racing. Its super loud. ZOOOOMMMMMMMM!!! HAHA throughout the course, we need to capsize again and again and again. We had a challenge from the coach. We have to all capsize at once and save ourself and also saving people. Its like a teamwork thing and we have to do in within 10 mins. HAHA it was a awesome capsize drill becos the sun is soaching HOT! I AM SERIOUS!!! We all got BURNT like really BURNT! if you see me in school you will know what i'm saying. We learnt all the strokes and stuff and its kinda cool that we have to paddle to a shore to park our boats and then head to the hawker for lunch. I mean not everyone could experience that man. Lunch was awesome. We had CHICKEN RICE FOR BOTH DAYS becos its cost $2. HEHE I must say it overall an awesome event!!! HEEE
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alright today is a bad day for me. I AM SUEPR PISSED OFF NOW! LIKE REALLY FUCKING PISSED. First things first, i don't know whats with me or in me or what i'm thinking about... saw her last night on my way home after water training at LSR. Saw her with her bf though we saw each other but somehow we treated like we never knew each other at all. Memories flashed back like stright away when i walk home all the way even when i was eating and i can't fall asleep. I kept thinking and thinking and thinking. All those 2 yrs of relationship slowly go through my mind like a story book chapter by chapter... I thought i got over a month ago. But once again, i was too wrong about it. I teared but give a fucked about it? I only told mum i saw her and all she cares was about her. asking how is she... I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO IS SHE NOW. HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW. SHES NO LONGER IN MY ARMS BUT ME LOOKING AT HER IN OTHER GUY'S ARM... i hate to say it but FUCK IT MAN! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! 2yrs of fuck damn relationship could be forgotten in months... it hurts so much deeply... too much to take. i feel like giving up everything and anything. i feel so sick and tired. both physical and mentally. i wanna not care about anything. i wanna just quit everything. training was demoralising. the more i train the lesser my confidence level go down. What the fuck can i do man? CAN I JUST GIVE UP EVERYTHING? WELL, MAYBE I SHOULD. but then again is it worthwhile doing this because of a girl i loved for 2yrs even till now? am i even loving the girl that i once knew or has she changed. i don't know. on top of that this morning i somehow felt fucking pissed. SO JUST SHUT UP AND DO NOT AGRIVATE ME BECAUSE I WILL JUST BURST OF ANYTIME I SWEAR!
WOOHOO!!! yes yes yes finally no work after training today!!! YAY!!! haha IM A HAPPY MAN!!! I FINALLY COULD HAVE A AFTERNOON NAP! hehe today's training was alright compared to yesterday. I swear saturday training was a killer. MY ARMS FELT LIKE IT WAS ABOUT TO BREAK ANYTIME MAN. IT WAS HOT LIKE CRAZY AND TRAINING WAS TOUGH. T1 sprint set was awesome man. It was mental mental and mental... I still dont think i'm fast enough to compete at all. I have to win the seniors T boat man. Worked after training yesterday, and guess what! YANLIN CAME TO FIND ME! hahah and she FOUND me with a hell load os FATS! haha THANK YOU!!! HEE so yea had an afternoon nap today and then out with family for POPEYE!!! GOD I SWEAR I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO EAT WITH THEM BECOS I HARDLY HAVE DINNER TGT WITH THEM SO NO CHOICE LO. SIGH!!! then got my hair cut real short... ewww but have to becos i fee irritated during training. so i got it cut short. Anyway, i a happy man today! hee
alright... today was my rest day and yes indeed i had just that tiny lil bit more rest compared to other days whereby most of us canoeist will be in the gyming playing with the equipments or in lower seletar moving boats in the water... HAHA normally we will be found in the school's sport complex but today, we did something different. CM, Hairul and i slacked at TRCC after school... HAHAH i swear it was a hilarious moment there editing a particular photo. WE LAUGH OUR ASS OFF!!! CM NICE ONE! today's lesson was cool but u know i had to attend some meeting to settle the SIT week which i will be the OIC and thus, that actually spoil my mood la i have to admit. ANYWA, its settled so yup...
Phew! finally have this time to gasp for a lil tiny bit of fresh air... Life has been busy as usual... At times i wonder if i have a girlfriend now, I guess she will be the one who suffers due to my hectic life style. Train eat school sleep train... My life cycles goes on and on non stop. I'm not sure what i'm thinking and i'm not sure what i got myself into... Challeneges in life huh? Tell me about it. Anyway, I guess class is getting better and well, cool peeps in class though. Still dragging myself to school due to some modules. I CAN SLEEP CAN!!!
busy wazzy makes me pissed-isy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
alright !!! finally i could have that little bit of space to take my breath... I really need a break but somehow, time just can't let me have the chance to. Those events that are all lineing up everyday of my life. I hardly have my own free time. Trainings, projects, school, work. Jeezz its killing me. i feel like leaving everything behind and walk away in the dark where noone can find me and stressless. But who am i in this world to do that when others have many more responsibility compared to me? life isn't easy and who ever said so?
DISAPPOINTED
alright yesterday was the start of second sem. I thought it will be alright anyway its just a new class. But i was wrong, i hate the feeling. Its a unexplainable feeling. I do not know anyone in class at all and i miss all my classmates. The comfort i feel in my ex class and now its totally different. I feel so empty. I mean my new maties are great, they tried talking to me. But somehow i dont know why my mood just made me feel like not talking at all. Well, my ex classmates will know why. But yea... first day was a drag and i kept telling myslef that tmr will be better. So today i woke up and drafg myself to school but yeah, i guess its getting better la. Finally spoken alil here and there. So yup yup yup... Hope things will go well.
alright. i guessed its my first time saying i enjoyed staying at home the whole day. Yup, i did. After all the buzzy wazzy life i had this week, i finally decided i should stay home to relax and do whatever i want and enjoy my breakfast tea in the morning! WOOT!!! i swear it was awesome. Had dinner with my family thought. Tmr morning will be going for land training. Let me see... another 6k, gym then pull ups and lastly abs exercise. Haa i'm all set and ready for what is gonna be given to me tmr... after that i will be meeting my ex classmates at east coast for the last outting. Gee, guys life is gonna be different without all of you in class man. And what am i suppose to do without someone to talk to about my emotional shit??? Wish me luck!!! anyway i hope tmr will be an enjoyable day for us! PLS PLS PLS dont RAIN!